Outside and beyond

I awoke this morning to come down the stairs and find a 'BIG CAT' as I think she now see's herself now.

When she was a few weeks old we brought her a little collor, at that time though it was massive and dragged on the floor under her.

Today was the first time it fitted her, she looked so grown up. Gill had decided to put Pru's barrol on it (keeps the address in), although it was empty she thought Spex may like it close to her to remind her of her mum.

I sat on the stairs in my jarmers, greasy hair and with a hidious face. Spex climed the beam and clambered onto my knee as if to say 'Look at me, Im a big girl' which she certainly seemed to be.

Somehow in the space of night she had changed, grown up. It brought a tear to my eye, as I was happy for her. Although where had her little innocence gone? She has grown so fast. I was so proud of her.

As a joint decision we decided that she could go and play outside. We were sure that she would not go near the road as it terrifies her, she doesnt go past the brick wall in the frount garden. (lucky).

Seeing her run up and down the garden, up the tree and down again on the shead and off it, there was no place in the garden near the house she has not seen. She was so happy, as if she had been working up for this moment for her whole life. She is a open spirit.

Pru was the same when she went out, it was amazing to see and from that moment we could see that you could not hold her back. She wanted to part of the world.

Spex is so much like her mum in many ways and I dont intend to keep that part locked away in the fear of death. Pru died doing what she loves doing, being free.

I do have worries on Spex's behalf however Spex is more alert when it comes to roads. Take her to the top of the road and she shakes with fright.

She is now weary and sleeping it all off in her igglu bed, still walking around the house when ever she wakes up showing us who is in charge. Showing that she is a 'big girl'